Monday, September 29, 2008

Likes & Dislikes

Inspired by Don.
(I'm sure he won't mind....)

A throwback 90s song
Waking up on a Saturday morning
Indie bands
Long, lingering hugs
Road trips to nowhere
Shopping for nick-nacks
Warm cookies
Giving things away
New notebooks
Kindness heard above Hate
A surprisingly good book

Confused facial expressions
Loud speech with no point
Writer's block
Election '08
Beauty contests for children
Mothers who abuse the Welfare System
The disappointment of a sucky movie that I was referred to see
My list of unfinished poems

Friday, September 19, 2008


I am on a quest.

At the beginning of the fall semester, I came across the words, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly."

For those of you who are unaware...this is John 10:10.
So, my quest is to figure out just what Jesus meant by "life, and have it more abundantly". I mean personally. For me. I am well accustomed to the first part of the verse, but at some point, I got tired of playing the martyr.

There are many things that have been taken from me. While I managed to hold on to a single strand of sanity throughout it all, I accepted the notion that I could end up living out the rest of my existence....empty-handed. And I thought that is what the Will of God was for me. What He was pleased with. I thought that is what He took notice of. What caught His attention. I used to picture myself as a small girl wearing a pretty yellow dress...with big brown eyes pleading for someone to tell me how pretty I looked. I took this mentality into my relationships...and even as I interacted with God, I figured that I must do something to win His approval. My poison? Suffering.

That's what "bearing your cross" is all about, right?

I've inquired of God these past few weeks about what does it really mean to have an abundant life. Does that include a fat bank account? Good health? A vast array of friends? A lucrative 401K plan?

Is it different for each person? How do we recognize it when we're living it? And how do we obtain it?

Well. This is what I've gotten so far:

"Living Life Inside-Out".

Change is accomplished and KEPT when it happens inside out. When we seek to change our surroundings or our environment, we should pray that the change begins inside of us. One of two things will happen:

1. We will literally change our environment for the better. And have grateful hearts.


2. We will see our environment change...but only because our perception of it has changed. We see it differently....and gain a grateful heart in the process.

It's an ancient concept, yet still remains true: your attitude is the only thing you can control. I am amazed at how the world around me morphs when I decide to change my attitude. I almost wished I'd thought of it first....

There is this song by Coldplay that astounds me...because it accurately states how I feel.
Daylight - Coldplay

To my surprise, and my delight
I saw sunrise, I saw sunlight
I am nothing in the dark
And the clouds burst to show daylight

Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realize
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without

On a hill top, on a sky-rise
Like a first born child
On a full day, and a full flight
Defeat darkness, breaking daylight

Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realize
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

"Still. [Spoken.Word.]" (For Those Who Have Forgotten).

the way the wind blows
acclaim follows suite.
i would rather stretch my frame
underneath the persistent sky.
though it varies in hues
it will never change its shape
still as infinite as before.
steady in its faithfulness
and ignored still.
so i will pay attention
and allow the sky to teach me
to be great without
being applauded,
to run from popularity with a clause,
and how
to use misunderstanding
to confirm my identity.
i lay. and i am still.
because the way the wind blows
acclaim follows suite.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Since When?.....(September Edition)


Since when did Neo-Soul front man Musiq Soulchild pattern his music after Lloyd and Usher?

I am sorely disappointed in this track. I own every album of Musiq's and, unlike this single, he didn't come close to using the words "aye" and "fresh".....whattheworld?????

It seems no genre is safe from the green-hued influence of mainstream. I guess Musiq got tired of his subtle status and decided to make something for the kids. I thought that he was above self-promotion and possessed conviction about the music he creates....silly me....
After watching it the first time...this video is truly upsetting. Second time around, my ears naturally place him into the category of the likes of Usher. Possessing nothing more than marketability. An entertainer.

But someone that I wouldn't pay $100 for a concert ticket.

Next up: Summer 2009 tour with Solider Boy.