I had every intention of remaining a virgin until my wedding night. Not only because it aligned with my morals, but because it was a dream of mine to save my body for the man that pledges his life, heart, and hand to me in the sacred covenant of marriage. I never really understood why most people (or girls, specifically) treated their sexuality with such thoughtlessness & disrespect. (My wish here is not to be judgmental, by the way.) I had friends who believed that being "free" sexually equated being irresponsible. It wasn't until I'd entered into my first serious relationship when my standards were tested. I never even considered "going all the way" until I fell in love.
And even though I was full of upright principles, sound Biblical evidence, and a proper upbringing, I still made subtle choices that led me to a series of bad decisions. Regrettably, I am not the young girl I was, on one hand. However, I am a grown woman who still muses over an old dream: to be a precious gift to my future husband. And to be pure in the eyes of God; forgiven and clothed with priceless Grace.
The matriarchs in my family used to be able to tell that a young woman had started to have sex because her hips would start to spread. I'm not sure how accurate that is, but it served as a proper metaphor concerning growing up:
Adult activity matures the infantile body.
God will begin to prepare the expecting mother for birth through all of the changes her body goes through in those 9 months. He is aware that giving birth is the most daunting, necessary task a human body can endure. An important part of this bodily transformation is how the hips spread (which happens in the first stage of childbirth, actually). It's all necessary, but too much if God has not already prepared the body.
We live in a culture where 11 and 12 year old girls have the bodies of grown women. Wide, voluptuous shapes that confirm that our children are growing up too fast. And when these girls become expectant mothers, it is more likely that the generation to come will be "pre-mature" & impatient in their thinking, maybe because they themselves were birthed by the premature. But we must have hope. Hope that God will still fulfill His promises & plan for every life.
I have hope. Despite my own premature entrance into the world, I still have opportunity to birth something great. These hips were created to birth greatness. I need only to be patient while God continues to prepare His vessel.
...I am grown, after all.
i'm sorry, but everytime you end with "...i am grown, after all." i keep hearing applause in my head.
ReplyDeletemuch like a post i made a while ago, why sit comfortably in our own weakness? why not agitate ourselves towards change and progression? i understand the purpose of "keepin' it real", but if we truly want God's blessing, we can't ignorantly stay in sin.
at least that's how i see it.
@ N.Steven: "and that's the truth, ruth." ;)
ReplyDeleteAMEN to this!!!
ReplyDeletethis is beautiful. <3 temptation is something aint it.
ReplyDeleteThis is good
ReplyDeleteAwesome read and an admired stance upon your part. Yes, the hips of young girls definitely tell it all when it comes to sexual activity.
ReplyDelete