Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Dream Girl. (A List)

I am 24 and are still considered an unmarried woman.  I've made plenty of mistakes, but have gained a bit of wisdom in the process. Granted, some of this list is pretty obvious, but you'd be surprised how often we've/I've intentionally did the opposite.
  1. Keep your priorities straight. Despite popular opinion, a relationship for an unmarried person should be at about 4th or 5th on the list. With God being 1st, family 2nd, academics 3rd, and work/life goals 4th. A man can tell if he is too high (or too low) on your priority list.
  2. Don't reveal too much, too soon. This applies to anything regarding intimate pieces of your Self. I can't tell you how many girls I've known that were heartbroken over a guy they've only known (not dated, known) for 6 months. Enjoy the process. And if you're trying to keep up with other couples, then you're probably going too fast.
  3. Value yourself, completely by yourself. Solitude is a beautiful thing, and is valuable even in relationships. If you're waiting for a person to make you feel whole, then you're setting yourself up for consistent disappointment. Plus, the time spent away will rejuvenate you and enrich the time you have with the other person.
  4. Learn to let your hair down. First of all, this requires you to be comfortable in your own skin. Many women make the mistake of over-primping themselves when they know they'll see their significant other. If you are serious about this man, show him you AS IS. This applies to the soul, as well. I know that you're a strong, powerful woman, but learn to let that wall brick at a time.
  5. Do some revision of that "must have" list. Sometimes our high expectations can be any relationship. Be wise, but gracious of others humanity. A man who feels safe to be himself is sure to give you the love you desire.
  6. Learn to cook. (If you're not much of a cook, at least master the basics.)
  7. Be competitive, not docile. Meaning, don't just let him win the basketball game. A man, though his ego may be bruised, loves it when his woman makes him step his game up. And engaging in any physical or competitive sport is always a good thing to share in a relationship.
  8. Have a sense of humor, and a hearty laugh. Those cute giggles will get annoying because they're not genuine. Stop coaxing his ego by laughing at his wack jokes. Instead, use a healthy amount of sarcasm. He'll be pleasantly surprised at your wit...because it keeps him on his toes. Which men like.
  9. Have a hobby or skill that he doesn't. It's good to share talents, but he'll appreciate that you're cultivating some other passion a part from his input. 
  10. Have an open mind. You don't know don't pretend you've got all the answers. This attitude will turn you into the classic "nag" that helps make a loveless marriage.


  1. I wish I would have learned this at 24 but hey I am so much better at it now. Thanks for the list Brit!

  2. Thank you for this. Lol, my distant advice giver :)

  3. Thank you for this. 'll be sure to apply every bit of it to my relationships as I move on to the bigger and hopefully better sea of college guys o.O

  4. @ Kia: Hahah...better late than never. I would have learned this a long time ago if I wasn't so hard headed. :)

    @ Donna Nicole: Thank you sis for reading! I'm glad that we can help each other out. :)

  5. Powerful Wisdom coming from such youthful years. You make me so proud.I'm blessed to have you for a daughter.Much,much love.

  6. I'm 46, and married 20 years... and this list isn't obvious. It should be in every woman's magazine with the other articles on "Beauty". So much less expensive and more valuable than that little black dress. Best of all - it doesn't require that you have an audience to acknowledge the beauty to make you 'feel' it, and no ironing required!

  7. Thank you so much for your comments, ladies. Anything that we all can contribute will benefit us as women. God bless!

    ps: I love you mommy. :)

  8. I love this list coming from a guy I'd have 2 say I totally agree. Hitting the print button now lls. Good Read!

  9. Number 2. makes all the sense in the world when I really sit and think about it. I understand where you're coming from, especially at the age of 24.

    I pretty much agree with everything stated, especially numbers 7,8, 9 and 10.

    A woman learning to let her hair down is a top priority as well.

  10. @ Don: In retrospect, I see 7-10 as unorthodox...because many women think you need to be the opposite way. I really try and pay attention...Glad you liked it :)
    Anything to add? lol

  11. 7. I like to know that a woman that I am involved with is able to hold her own or compete in an attempt to hold her own. I find that inspiring and sexy.

    8. Witty is always good. It definitely keeps the man on his toes. How do you manage to create that perfect or near-perfect balance?

    9. As a man, I love to witness a woman all involved in her passionate being, whether it's involved her doing something similar or foreign to myself.

  12. You definitely have my respect for this one. I hope some learn from your insight