After hearing this word for the millionth time, I decided to study it. Figure out why this word has become a Philosophy. A Doctrine even. I've heard preachers use it from pulpits. It was the topic of choice for my (S)he-ro's first single off of her new album: The Real Thing. It hit our society like a meteor, as if it is the Diagnoses for all of our problems. It is the Root & it becomes the Enemy.
"Don't even worry about her, girl...She ain't nothing but a hater."
We already live in a want-driven society. We don't want a thing for long, though, because there is always something newer, brighter, or more upscale to want. Nothing wrong with wanting things, but WHY do we want them? They don't seem to deeply satisfy something, so there must be some temporal need that it meets.
My grandmother used to say that people are always trying to "Keep Up with the Jones' ". Remember that term? Some of us are literally in a race to outdo everyone else. And by "everyone else", I mean our peers. Our neighbors. The girl that's dating my ex. Even our friends. Yes, even them. We are afraid to let others shine because we think that it means we lose a little bit of our own light. And we were raised and taught throughout life that "No one's light is more important than yours." & "Don't let anyone shine more than you."
So, let's look at the two people involved in this "Hate"' relationship: the hated and the hater. By definition, the hater is uncomfortable with the hated getting so much attention, and purposefully slanders the reputation of the hated, so that people will praise them less. Secondly, the hated is "innocently" shining, and becomes subjected to the hater's wrath. They therefore, dislike the hater. Thus, completing the cycle...
In the beginning of this phenomenon, the hated acted like victims, gaining the pity of those rallying around them. But now, suddenly, the hated are now boasting at the number of haters they had. It has become a desirable attribute in life. No one wishes to live peaceably with their neighbor, or to cultivate loving relationships, but they would rather increase in the number of people who "hate" on their way of living. The hated quickly say that the opinions of the hater means nothing, but will turn right around and feed their ego with the jealousy of who?...that's right: The Hater.
The root of the two names can be attributed to the two extremes of Self-Esteem. The Hated are often so self-absorbed that they sum the Hater's negativity down to being a "Hater". Many times it is the very first judgement they come to. And instead of seeking restitution with the other person, they would rather stand on their insubstantial conclusion. As stated before, it is often the most saught after rationale. The "Hater", however, usually struggle with a lower level of self-esteem; emphasizing the accomplishments of others and ignoring with makes them unique.
The Remedy for both? In the simplest terms, the Hater needs to love himself and the Hated needs to get over himself....They should both then work on uplifting the other; becoming totally comfortable with allowing him or her to shine as bright as he or she possibly can.
It's a dark world and we need all the light we can get...
Let Love Reign.
My grandmother used to say that people are always trying to "Keep Up with the Jones'
ReplyDeleteSame thing my deceased grandmother would say. She's also preached about how people need to sweep around their own front doors, moreso than pointing their fingers @ others' dirt.
This is the first time I've ever seen the term broken down into a science. Then again, I've come to expect that from you and n.steven.
A higher level of Self-esteem definitely goes a LONG ways. At times I too could stand to increase the doseage.